UberEats Skeptic Pretty Sure He Just Ate Taco Bell Burrito Full Of Jizz

“When I unwrapped my Beefy 5 layer burrito, I knew there was something funny going on,” said a red-eyed man with long hair and a Bob Marley t-shirt, who also happened to be a stoner. “They left out all the good stuff. All it had was iceberg lettuce and some kind of… sour cream?”

With the increase of at home delivery services due to COVID-19, many skeptics like this man here have been forced to face their own fears of having an unknown delivery driver cum shot their Quesarito.

“I thought I’d get some delicious beefy cheese. Turns out, it was nutter butter!”

• Tido Maldonado, The Terminal Times

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