Embarrassing: This Lumberjack Doesn’t Even Listen To Mumford & Sons

Paul Grinnell, 43, a rural woodworker and a poor man’s Clint Eastwood film protagonist, isn’t remotely interested in his own culture.

“The guy doesn’t own a single vinyl record,” said Brett, a local cidery owner and stick-and-poke tattoo enthusiast. “Yeah, he can chop wood, but his musical chops leave much to be desired.” Not only does he fly in the face of popular music – he seems to enjoy no aspect of the lumberjack culture.

Elise, a part-time Instagram poet and frozen yogurt artisan, echoed this statement. “I mean, what do you call a craftsman that can’t enjoy a single craft beer? Dude seems like a real poser to me.”

Gemini, an unpaid yoga studio intern, chimed in: “Sometimes I get really sad to see someone like him who has so little understanding of what really matters. He’s so disconnected. The only tweets he knows anything about are the ones the birds make.”

Paul declined to comment, as he was busy with his wife and children or something like that.

• Jacob Nuckolls, Terminal Times

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