Libtards Storm Capitol Dressed As Gas Station Employees

Conservatives looked on in disdain yesterday as a violent libtard militia stormed Capitol Hill disguised as gas station employees.

“This is left-wing terrorism in its lowest form,” said a sweating Gavin McInnes last night. “Trust me, if this were real republicans doing this, we would’ve taken over in half the time, and many, many liberals would die. Left wing propaganda is no match for the iron fist of Axe Body spray and off brand assault rifles.” Other conservative reporters agreed, claiming libtards were “too wussy” to use extreme violence.  

Dilbert creator Scott Adams explained the situation in a three hour podcast at 4am this morning, claiming the attacks were proof of “widespread fraud,” and that machines shouldn’t be allowed to vote due to “lack of sentience.” Adams spent 30 minutes making a visual representation of the chaos, which professional code-breakers were too bored to decipher.

Libtard leaders argued the points, saying the gun-toting Speedway janitors May suffer from “lack of sentience” themselves.

• The Terminal Times

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