National Guard Still Training

Today marks the 100 year anniversary of military training for the entire National Guard, and the soldiers are happy to not have to do anything.

“It’s cool to have guns,” said Jeremy Rogers, a 17 year old Sergeant on a smoke break at a local training facility. “Want a hit?”

Rogers is an expert Guards Trainer, specializing in sitting down, cracking a beer, and chilling with the boys. “I let us smoke inside now,” he said with a cough and a fist bump from a dreadheaded corporal. “It’s awesome.”

Although chill environments are a staple of National training outposts, many soldiers are a bit confused about the lack of respect towards their duty.

“People thank me for my service when they see my suit,” said Rogers with a laid back demeanor, “but as soon as they see ‘National Guard’ on it, I get accused of being a drug dealer.”

To most Guardsman, however, the ridicule is worth it. “I’ve retired a few times in the past few years for veteran benefits,” he said with a Patriotic grin. Like most National soldiers, Rogers is happy to be an American. Getting wasted, having a gun, and mooching off the government.

December 22, 2021

  • The Terminal Times

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